The new “First Date” greeting card….

Posted by Posted in Biographical Scrapbooking, Cartoons & Jokes, Humor & Satire Posted on 26-09-2011

Since I have obviously brought up the subject of greeting cards in my previous post, there was a moment in time, however fleeting, that I was contemplating a new line of greeting cards. I mean let’s face it, there are greeting cards for just about everything these days. But there is always room for a new one if you can conjure a niche for one.

In my case and being up front and quite honest about it, I had created the greeting card before it struck me as to the new creation harboring the possibility of becoming a new genre of greeting card. And it seemed even more appropriate as having a “first date” application.

And there is the functional aspect to having and giving such a card also. The giving of such a card to a new love interest expresses the fact that surely you are a thoughtful and caring person, one not likely to forget get those infamous birthdays and anniversaries as the years roll by.

Without further adieu let me get right to the card presentation. Directly below is a card I believe would be a barn-burner in the genre of “First Date” greeting cards….

Greeting Card - First Date(Click on image to enlarge)

I mean let’s face it…. in today’s society the time between visualizing a love interest as naked and the actuality of the real occurrence is an extremely short amount of time. In my generation however, those visualizations were continued over weeks, months, sometimes even years before being consummated into just the glimpse of the female naked body. But these days it’s my understanding that one is lucky to get through dinner before the breast makes its initial appearance.

And this my friends is the kind of post you come up with when the well has pretty much dried up. Have a good one…… 🙂

Love Thy Neighbor As Thyself….

Posted by Posted in Biographical Scrapbooking, Complaints & Grievances, Humor & Satire Posted on 15-09-2011

Over the last few years I have begun to wonder just what the Lord must have been thinking when He put forth His doctrine of unconditional love with regard to our neighbors. Certainly there must be some guidelines to this edict that have yet to be discovered. When they discovered the “Dead Sea Scrolls” in the late 40′s – early 50′s I am sure there were a number of old people from that generation that held out some hope the newly discovered religious texts might shed some light on the subject along with some criteria on the matter but alas, there was apparently no additional information to be found.

There are some of us old folks who are well known for our attitudes regarding neighborhood children playing in our yards. And yet the first time we incur admonishment for such behavior in the Holy Scriptures is early on when in Leviticus 19:18 the Lord seems to speak directly to this subject saying, “Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself: I am the LORD.” This subject matter is addressed in similar manner some eleven more times in the Protestant version of the English Bible by Jesus, Paul and James.

But of course when it comes to our neighbors certainly it is not all about children issues. The reality is that it is all about the adults otherwise referred to as the homeowners. I have some good neighbors, some not so good neighbors, and then one or two that just really suck at it! Unfortunately in my case I have had the ill fortune of ending up living between the two that for the most part really suck at it!

I have over the years volunteered to do numerous things for my neighbors including tending their yards from time to time when they were otherwise predisposed. One incident comes to mind with regard to a poison ivy infestation in one of my next door neighbor’s yards. They commented one day to me that they have to stay out of a particular area of their backyard and worry about their kids coming in contact with it. Well, being one of those fortunate individuals who has never seemed to have any adverse reactions to the plant, I said I would be happy to see what I could do with regards to removing it. That afternoon I went over and removed all that I could find as best I could. Over the next three years in keeping with my commitment I continued to monitor any return growth going back several times to root out remnants of the stubborn ivy. That was several years ago and I am still waiting for even the slightest hint of an acknowledgment for the deed.

Now perhaps all these acts of love directed at my neighbors sit well with the Lord with all that “love thy neighbor” crap but I can assure you, it doesn’t sit well with me!

This same neighbor had a small metal shed that was seemingly only moments away from total collapse for a number of years and rather than remove it they kept it in a secluded corner of their yard where they couldn’t see it and shoved it up against my fence with the shed leaning somewhat precariously over toward my yard.

After sitting there for almost two years looking like the redneck version of the Tower of Pisa, I decided to that I needed to get a little more creative in my approach to these kinds of neighbors. I had at some point taken a few photos of the damn thing but then as Christmas approached that particular year I had one of those self-induced creative moments. It occurred to me that in keeping with the “love thy neighbor” criteria I should send my next door neighbor a Christmas card this year. But not just any Christmas card. No, this had to be a special card that encompassed all the love that I harbored for these wonderful people and so it was that a vision of the card you see below came to be….

Christmas Card - Irresponsible Neigbor(Click on image to view full size rendition)

And yes, that is the subject shed which graces the front of the lovely card. In the end of course I could not bring myself to send the card. Certainly I got some relief during the creation of the card but it was a hollow victory. Eventually I had to call our city’s Code Enforcement who stimulated the neighbor into immediately removing the shed.

Hopefully with the writitng of this post I will enjoy a bit of further relief from my lot in life with regard to neighbors and the like….

Bar-B-Q from the fast lane….

Posted by Posted in Complaints & Grievances, Food & Cooking, General Information, Photography Posted on 08-09-2011

Like many other folks, I love BBQ and a few weeks ago I was doing my weekly shopping at my local grocery, Kroger’s, when I spied a large display of Corky’s Bar-B-Q selling for $12.99 a side. As ribs go that price sounded pretty good. And Corky’s BBQ is fairly well known, especially in the QVC circles.

Now, believe it or not I have never purchased any BBQ from a grocery store – I’m talking about the raw, uncooked BBQ of course. Just lazy I guess because even though I absolutely love the stuff it takes forever to cook it – or so I’ve heard and read. I’m one of those instant gratification people I suppose when it comes to cooking. I think forty-five minutes or so is about my threshold for waiting for something to cook. Anyway, I picked up one of the packages and began to read that this brand was pre-cooked pork BBQ and if you prepared it on a grill it would be ready in 18-25 minutes. Now….that’s more my style!

Well I couldn’t help myself – especially at what seemed to be a pretty good price so I purchased a package. The following week at some point I decided it was time to “pig-out” on my BBQ (no pun intended). It was quite a generous portion. I had to actually cut the side in-half so that it would fit on my grill since you weren’t suppose to cook it over direct heat. And indeed after having meticulously followed the cooking instructions in about 20 minutes it was time to eat. And once again I couldn’t help myself so I had to take a photo of the pre-devoured ribs.

Corky’s Packaged Barbeque Ribs(Click on photo to enlarge)

As it turns out, the ribs looked a whole lot better than they tasted. They just weren’t those good old “fall-off-the-bone” ribs one fantasizes over. One of my sister’s and her husband eat them quite regularly and really enjoy them. I have to say I may have been over-expecting but that is just one man’s opinion….

In Remembrance – My High School Best Friend….

Posted by Posted in Biographical Scrapbooking, In Remembrance Posted on 06-09-2011

Jerry Sims - 01

A few weeks ago I got a real shock when I received an email informing me that Jerry, my best friend in high school, had suddenly passed away. This was the first time that I had experienced the loss of a close and dear friend. The suddenness of it was also quite unsettling.

In those younger high school days we shared our hopes and dreams with each other and there were never any secrets. It was a treasured and trusting relationship as surely all “best friends” relationships must be. Below are a couple of pictures I scanned from our high school annual in our senior year – 1960.

Best Friends - High School

As often happens, our lives took us down different paths but we always seemed to stay in touch. Sometimes years would pass between contacts but eventually those moments would occur. When I relocated back here in North Little Rock in 1990 we eventually found each other again and would somehow manage to have lunch together once or twice a year.

It goes without saying that I could go on and on about our friendship and adventures as young teenagers and for sure, those are treasured memories but for the moment I just wanted to share his passing. If you have ever seen the movie, “American Graffiti”, then you’ve had a close encounter with myself and Jerry. Jerry said he always liked my blogs and he knew blogging was something I enjoyed so it only seems fitting that I would take a moment to share our story here. I think he would have liked that.

Rest in peace dearest friend….

I can’t believe I am doing this again….

Posted by Posted in Journal & Blog Information Posted on 03-09-2011

I have not a clue why I am reactivating this blog but obviously I have. Perhaps I had a mild stroke and I am unaware of what I am doing. That does seem to make the most sense at the moment. Perhaps, on the other hand, it all stems from a troubled childhood. I suppose it matters little because I am surely aware of how it will all end – just as it has so many times before.

So….I will just leave it at that!